God I was scared I felt like I was drowning in my own fear. Confused to who I even was, am I this child or am I supposed to help this child?
I looked at my hands, so small and pail, the gulp of tears in my throat finally reach my eyes, my head feeling pressure, as tears role down my small cold cheeks.
I rest my hand on my heart “Why is my heart beat so faint... What's happening to me” my voice shaky as I spoke in fear.
The woman stays silent, places her hand on my head, and closes her eyes for a moment, removing her hand a few seconds later.
I began to think, to think as myself as this child's feelings run through herself and me, I needed to protect this child.
“What are you doing? “I said, sitting with a single shake throughout my whole body, like cold shivers after coming from a snow day out.
Why is this child so cold? Can this child hear my thoughts? I constantly kept wondering to myself.
The woman sighed softly, a deep longing her eyes, catching the light the open window, from the front door. A secrete within her mind that she cannot speak of, killing her not too but she must not speak a word of it.
“who are you" I speak louder this time, becoming persistent, I stand up with the constant shake within my body, the strength to hold my weight, slowly coming back as I begin to protect her.
She sighs again, cupping my cheek, wish she would remember, the longing becoming too much.
“Ping, ping” off goes the little girls, phone. I grab the banister, pulling my phone out, looking at the home screen, a message from her sister
So many thoughts were running through my mind, so many thoughts were running through this child's mind, but why is she so hesitant to open it? Isn't this a good thing?
I pushed her gently to open it gently, trying to make her feel okay, focusing on her mind, pushing her thoughts into my mind.
Our shared mind was clear, I looked up at this woman, fetchers of her face becoming so familiar, but also forgetting how faint my heart beat was, forgetting how cold I was.
I looked back down at my phone; I open up my sister massage.
“stay their Ally! I'm coming home okay? Theres traffic because of this silly storm, that’s about to hit, but I'll be home soon, hide okay! “
Confused emotions run through my mind, feeling the pressure build up. Realizing how long it's been since she left, seeing how dark it is outside as the light fades from the window, nothing was making since.
The woman tries to rap her arms around me, I shake my head, pushing away and slipping under arm, I look at Josh, tapping my leg, hoping he will follow me, he runs to me, whining.
“Don't leave” the womans voice becomes shaken as her eyes starts to water.
A pull from outside, the front door as I hear the rain, pouring, I feel fear of the child clouding her mind and mine as we both become overwhelmed, the Childs mind shifting with mine.
As my mind clears, gained back my sense, we are already half way down the street as the rain pours down her small little arms, cold pressure against the skin we share skin.
We stop, looking up at the sky, dripping from the cold rain, by a large Lake, a silence that takes over both of our minds, the peace taking over her movement.
The Lake was as still as ocean on a summer's day, no tides, just peaceful and filled with bliss.
The tears down our little cheeks, slowly stopped, leaning over to clean the tears away with the fresh cold water, mesmerised by the beaty of this lake, I calm her mind down, by taking away what was consuming her, a small smile hit her cheek as she looked at the pond.
I start to gain memories of days of this little girl, in summer with her sister, swimming in the pond, laughing. Filling any pain with beauty and peace.
I stand up. Slipping my shoes off, placing my feet in the water, the feeling of the water surrounding my feet, soothing, a hard ground under my toes.
Stepping into the pond more and more as the water finally reaches my waist, I start pushing forward as I swim breast stroke, feeling my body, become light, not minding my head slip under for a moment or so, suddenly, I feel my foot, become stuck, the mud trapping my foot, becoming stronger as I struggle, far in the distance I hear the woman, running to the lake, quickly, forgetting to take of her red coat.
She swims to me as fast as she can, swimming under as she tries to remove my foot, but ending up very unsuccessful...
. My legs felt so tight, my throat of growing tears, my legs start to weaken, I look up, the top of the lake seems to be getting far away... so dark. So cold.
My heart was beating so fast, my head felt like it was going to explode, till my mouth slips open, filling my small little lungs, my body begins to jerk, aggressively, I finally remember. Was her last thought...